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You May Be in an Abusive Relationship If...

...your partner tells you they can't live without you.

...your partner blames you for his/her problems.

...you partner breaks or hits things to intimidate you.

...your weight, appearance or grades have changed dramatically since you started seeing this person.

...your partner threatens to hurt himself/herself or others if you break up with them.

...the person you're dating acts jealously, says jealous things, or exhibits aggressive behaviors towards you.

...your partner pressures you into having sex, or forces you to do sexual things you don't want to do by saying, "If you really loved me, you would."

...your partner humilates you and belittles your opinions.

...your partner slaps or shoves you in a seemingly playful way, but it happens often and doesn't seem right.

...your partner is jealous and possessive about the time you spend with your friends.

...your partner is constantly checking up on you, and asking where you are and what you are doing.

...your partner has severe mood swings or constant bad moods.

...your partner wants to limit your other school activities, so you can "be together more."

...you're frightened of your partner and worry about how he/she will react to things you say or do.

...your partner wants your relationship to get too serious too quickly, and he/she refuses to take "no" for an answer.

...your partner blames past bad relationships on everything or everybody else instead of accepting any of the responsibility.

...she abuses drugs or alcohol and pressures you to take them with her even when you don't want to.

...your partner's statements or actions indicate that he/she thinks men should be in control and women should do what they're told.

...your partner treats you like property, rather than a person they value.

...when your partner gets angry, she calls you names, kicks, hits or pushes you.

...your partner is abusive or aggressive towards inanimate objects and animals.

...your partner forces you to choose being with them over your family and friends.

...your partner makes you feel that her needs and desires come before yours.

...your partner makes you feel afraid to express your own thoughts or feelings, make decisions about how to spend your money, what to wear, where to go, or who to hang out with.

...your partner lashes out or blames you for his/her bad day.

...your family and friends have warned you about this person or have told you that they're worried about your safety.

...your partner uses or owns weapons, and has a history of violence and fighting.

...your partner blows disagreements out of proportion.

...your partner tells you they dislike your parents and friends.

...your partner has hit, pushed, choked, restrained, kicked or physically hurt you.

...your partner constantly threatens to break up with you, or constantly accuses you of planning to break up with her.

...your partner treats his/her parents disrespectfully.

...your partner often loses their temper with you, verbally assaults you, sometimes threatens you, or brags about mistreating others.

...your partner wants you to be available to him/her at all times.

...your partner's threats and anger are followed by vows of love and pleas for your forgiveness.

If you said yes to even one, you may be in an abusive relationship. Click here to find some resources to help.


Adapted from the ABA Teen Dating Violence Prevention Recommendations. 



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